i have never understood people who expect more of others than they do of themselves. in a certain sense of the word. i mean, i expect kobe bryant to be better at basketball than me. i expect george bush to receive more criticism than me. i expect the garbageman to visit more houses than me. i expect girls to sing higher than me. i expect taco bell to make lunch faster than me. i expect supermarket tabloids to know more about skankiness than me. i expect the cincinatti bengals to employ more lawyers than me. i expect blood banks to hold more blood than me.
but i dont really expect policeman to be better judges of the law than me. i dont expect my pastor to be more moral than me. i dont expect my teachers to use better logic than me. i dont expect my friends to understand me better than me.
maybe this still seems reasonable. but there's more.
i expect the best of myself, and i often expect less than the best of others. practically, this works pretty well. theoretically, it seems demeaning and self-righteous.
when i mess up, i expect myself to rectify things. sometimes i find excuses if there's nothing better to do, but i rarely believe them myself. i also tend to hold myself above the reproach of others, deciding instead that i'm sufficiently demanding of myself.
with others, i can make anything not their fault. i can rationalize most everything. in taking away their responsibility, i also take from them part of their authority to choose. maybe not physically, but at least in my mind. i must (begrudgingly) conclude that this says something about the respect i have for that person.
it's not in my nature to expect or accept from myself anything less than my best (maybe this is my belief in God, or maybe I am making excuses my behavior in the form of inherent credos). im wishing right now i could be more fair with others. there's much unfairness in things as it is. i'd rather not contribute.
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